The Mayonnaise Jar and Two Beers.

When things in your life seem almost too much to handle, when 24 hours in a day are not enough, remember the mayonnaise jar and the 2 Beers.


Hoosierteacher stood before the crowded lecture hall at MHR University. Styg, Guru, Zappa, mdierk( the A students) were all in the front row, eager to learn. Firstfan was in the back with his dunce cap on. All of the students were there. Super7 and Jon Tollerud were hoping for an in-depth discussion of the now famous 3-3-5 defense. But instead Hoosierteacher had some unusual items in front of him.


When the class began, he wordlessly picked up a very large, empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was. Hoosierteacher then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full . They agreed it was.


Hoosierteacher next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “yes”. Hoosierteacher then produced two Beers from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar effectively filling the empty space between the sand. All the students laughed except for Trinidad Jack who cried.


“Now,” said Hoosierteacher as the laughter subsided, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things---the Broncos, your family, your children, your health, and your friends---and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car.The sand is everything else---the small stuff, things like the guy who cut you off in traffic or oakland or Phyllis and his Merry men.


Guru jumped up and shouted “I get it! If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important like the Broncos and MHR.” All of the other students were awed by Guru’s wisdom.


“Exactly right!” said Hoosierteacher “'Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Spend time with your children. Teach them to love the Broncos. Spend time with your parents. Visit with grandparents. Learn of your Bronco roots. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner and explain the advantages of the 3-4 over the 4-3 given our current personnel. Spend more time on the computer with MHR. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first---the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”


Then from the middle of the room Broncofanstuckinsd raised her hand and inquired what the Beer represented. Hoosierteacher smiled and said, “I'm glad you asked. The Beer just shows you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of Beers with a friend to talk about the Broncos.”


This adaptation of an old Bronco folk tale, passed down from father to son, was submitted by the guy in the back row with the dunce cap and was based on an email from Danver.






This is a Fan-Created Comment on The opinion here is not necessarily shared by the editorial staff of MHR

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