FanPost

if I were a raiders fan

In 14 days the Broncos play the raiders.  To help start with the fun fest I have the following article.

If I were a Raiders fan (with the mighty power to actually change things): 

I would get rid of the "Black Hole" reference from the stadium.  Below are just a couple of the many reasons why the name needs dropped.

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via tbn0.google.com


1)  Many sick jokes about the "Black hole" being male anatomy are bad and need to be avoided.

2) All the Star Wars extras don’t fit. 
2a) Darth Raider – Really.  According to the movies ole Darth not only dies but gives a group hug moment with Yoda and Obie Wan while Luke looks on.
2b) See reference made by "Triumph the Comedy Dog" about Darth using a button to call his mommy at a Star Wars convention.
See the following video (7 minute mark)
http://www.comedy.com/embed/triumph-insults-star-wars-fans
2c) To the guys dressed as Storm Troopers.  The Storm Troopers a Clones of Boba Fett (who gets eaten by a sand critter).  Not exactly a good role model.

3) Who are you marketing to?  The Star Wars fanatics who usually don’t care about the NFL?  The space aliens who probe people in bad ways?


If I were a Raiders fan (with power)

1) I would change  "Network Associates Coliseum" where the Raiders play to "Network Associates Mausoleum" or just "The Mausoleum". 


From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

A mausoleum (plural: mausolea) is an external free-standing building constructed as a monument enclosing the interment space or burial chamber of a deceased person or persons. A mausoleum may be considered a type of tomb or the tomb may be considered to be within the mausoleum. A Christian mausoleum sometimes includes a chapel)

 

Images_medium

via tbn0.google.com


 

2) The stadium logo could be "Where opponent’s hopes of victory go to DIE!".


3) All the Black look would still fit. All Raiders fans can still rejoice.


4) All the Undead possibilities would be available.  Ghosts, Zombies, Vampires,  Lich (powerful undead wizard), Wraiths, etc.


5) Other creatures that haunt cemeteries could be available (Demon, Devil, etc)


6) Expanded marking with H**ls Angels biker gang, the whole "Goth" black wearing crew, People that are into undead, and many others. 
6a) Even the Space Aliens die sometime (See Darth above for details).
6b) Almost every culture has an undead or other creature (see 5 above) in it.   


 7) I would keep the Raider cheerleaders and add the Mausoleum "Spirit Squad".  While the cheerleaders stay on the field, the attractive Pom Pom Spirit Squad would cheer up the crowd from the stands.  "Zombie" body guards would be assigned to protect the women from drunken fans etc.  This will also give more possibilities on going to outside the stadium events and bringing in extra money (while Cheerleaders are at a convention the Spirit Squad could be at a book signing). 


In conclusion:  Mausoleum = idea good, Black Hole – not so much.

This is a Fan-Created Comment on MileHighReport.com. The opinion here is not necessarily shared by the editorial staff of MHR

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