The Dude Abides...It's Charger Limerick Time...Again
by TJ Johnson on Nov 18, 2009 8:24 PM MST
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Divisional opponents inspire hate. And mockery. So let round two of the Charger Limericks begin!. The first attack on the Chargers can be found here.
Here are five that I created. Please feel free to make up your own. And Chargers' fans, please participate if you have the inclination (or the intelligence). With the beach and the surfing, one wonders if Chargers' fans can count syllables.
At the end of the season, I'll do a post with the top 10 limericks of the season for everyone to vote on.
The Reality of Phil Rivers
Phil, you're not seein' JC no more.
So sit and cry and look at the score.
Doom's lickin' his chops
to knock off some blocks
And crush your face to the Mile High Roar.
LT, Let's Party
LT, there's a ticket here for you
To join the party in orange and blue
You're the featured guest
In a bone crush fest
Thanks for bringing a fumble or two.
BDawk, Meet Gates
Gates don't be runnin' that dawg gone route
up the seam, untouched, with your hand out.
Man, don't you come this way
Or you are gonna pay
with a freight train through your chest, no doubt.
Darren Sproles, Leprechaun
He's the scat-back on kick off return
A powder-blue leprechaun with burn.
You don't kick to his side
Or he can turn the tide,
But face it, the dude fits in an urn.
Norv Turner, Super Genius
Here, he's calling another screen pass.
The defensive isn't a horse's ass.
They saw that silly play.
At least a mile away,
Norv, go back to your Looney Tunes class.
This is a Fan-Created Comment on MileHighReport.com. The opinion here is not necessarily shared by the editorial staff of MHR
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The Dude
It’s time once again for The Dude
To post up some limericks, tho rude.
But all will agree,
with calm certainty,
The Chargers are gonna get screwed.
by Rain on Nov 19, 2009 2:08 AM MST reply actions 4 recs
hahaha nice
"Really, I'm a high-motor guy. Tough, hard-nosed, a hard runner, can make you miss at times. And just competitive. I love to play the game and I bring that energy to my team. So, we'll see how that goes." - Knowshon Moreno
Knowshon Moreno=ROY
hey, rain! Unexpected pleasure. I will print this one off today and laugh my ass off
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Love it!
Nice ending, in particular.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
LT's Dead Batteries
An ode to LT from The Bolts,
Who’s runs used to give out a few Jolts.
But now he’s totally prone,
like the battery in my phone,
His play has some amps….. but no Volts!
by Rain on Nov 19, 2009 2:26 AM MST reply actions 1 recs
Rain, I am glad you had a good one on this.
LT has lost..um…more than one step:-)
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Nicely done!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
How about...
There was once a man named Merriman
And the Chargers think that he’s a scary man.
But the run game will pound
Him down to the ground
So instead of a star he’ll be a wary man.
"People who work together will win, whether it be against complex football defenses, or the problems of modern society." - Vince Lombardi
by broncospriestess on Nov 19, 2009 8:05 AM MST reply actions 3 recs
The Priestess Returns in full force!!!
Good to see you back! Sweet Limerick!
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Triple rhymes - nice!
Adelante, Broncos!
by Chapulin Colorado on Nov 19, 2009 9:49 AM MST up reply actions
You rhymed Merriman thrice.
Amazing.
And, I love your Lombardi quote…. I might have to steal it.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
ode to tequila
along came a girl from tijuana
boy or girl, no matter! do you wanna ?
Merriman was late with his NO!
and then he called her a HO!
& now Norv has to sterilize the sauna.
by Jenna Talia on Nov 19, 2009 8:16 AM MST reply actions 7 recs
Instant Classic.
Monumental Limerick!
"He can take his'n n beat your'n, or he can take your'n n beat his'n." Florida A&M Coach Jake Gaither on Alabama Coach Paul "Bear" Bryant.
JT, this one has to end up in a book...
or at least in a post at the end of the year with the top 10 limericks
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Double rhymes - nice!
Mr. Merriman doesn’t seem to be very popular around here.
Adelante, Broncos!
by Chapulin Colorado on Nov 19, 2009 9:50 AM MST up reply actions
Hey man I like your name!
Where are you from?
"The night is darkest just before the dawn."- Harvey Dent
I used to live in Denver, but now I live in Portland
I watch the TV reruns on Univision.
Adelante, Broncos!
by Chapulin Colorado on Nov 19, 2009 7:54 PM MST up reply actions
Sweet
I used to watch the reruns when I was growing up.
"The night is darkest just before the dawn."- Harvey Dent
That is covered in WIN sauce, JT!
"Take what you can. Give nothing back!"
by Colorado_Kitten on Nov 19, 2009 3:15 PM MST up reply actions
HAHAHAHAHA
LOVE the sauna line….LOL.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
letter perfect!
Boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy misses girl…. what more is there to say, really?
rec’d
"I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today" -- Wimpy J. Wellington
by Broncs Cheer on Nov 19, 2009 11:09 PM MST up reply actions
That is great Jenna
I would hope you would support who we are. Not, who we are not. Coach Norman Dale "Hoosiers"
by dmitchell624 on Nov 21, 2009 7:24 AM MST up reply actions
I have a Knowshon!
When the Chargers & Broncos collide,
An unexpected hero will turn the tide.
McD will unleash Moreno,
Who’ll run like Captain Insano,
Through big gaping holes oh so wide!
"He can take his'n n beat your'n, or he can take your'n n beat his'n." Florida A&M Coach Jake Gaither on Alabama Coach Paul "Bear" Bryant.
Tunerstoe
Wow! I am floored! The waterboy reference is freakin’ awesome.
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
There was a team up in the mountains
whose wins at the start came like fountains
but their defense takes Geritol
and now they can’t win at all
Their playoff hopes now all are doubtin’
There once was was a QB named Orton
Whose play at the start was quite sportin’
but his ankle did twist
and his long ball oft missed
through his resume now he is sortin’
A receiver in Denver was Marshall
whose maturity was only partial
with a bag he did fight
but the bag, it did bite
now passes he drops by the cart full.
"Football is a physical sport, sometimes you have a disagreement on what's going on, and you have a discussion about it." Kris Dielman
by Brian (DaBolts) on Nov 19, 2009 10:24 AM MST reply actions 2 recs
Brian, I like it! Thanks for coming over and giving it a run!
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
OK....
As a limerick this is quite sound.
The triple-attack does astound!
Your meter and rhyme
Is impressive this time,
But your content is wrong all around.
Thanks for joining in this post!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
Well played sir...
The Marshall one was flippin hilarious!
"It's okay to eat fish, 'cause they don't have any feelings" - Kurt Kobain
by JChase8410 on Nov 20, 2009 10:51 AM MST via mobile up reply actions
Ode to the Charger
In June only they have a chance
In November they might still advance
But when the chips fall
That means nothing at all
They never will go to the dance
by Jeeeeens on Nov 19, 2009 12:42 PM MST reply actions 2 recs
The classic. Like a white tee shirt and blue jeans. Chargers = Epic Playoff Fail
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Ode to Charger 56
With mowhawk, some yell fifty six
His dance ends with one punch and a kick
But his anger won’t yield
When he steps off the field
And Tequila thinks he is a …… WHOA!!!!!!
If Taylor Swift were to try and tackle me, I'd let her.
lol, we need an interactive.....BLEEP;-)
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
lol, I didn't intend for my limerick to take that direction, but what else was I supposed to use with six and kick??
It is what it is.
If Taylor Swift were to try and tackle me, I'd let her.
by Troy Hufford on Nov 19, 2009 4:09 PM MST up reply actions
um...let's see, I am sure you meant, brick, right? ;-0
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
"Exactly" was supposed to go here. My bad.
If Taylor Swift were to try and tackle me, I'd let her.
by Troy Hufford on Nov 19, 2009 6:32 PM MST up reply actions
I LOVE this thread... again!
The inj’ry report looks important
With Bucky and Harris and Orton.
But Josh is adept
At talent in depth,
Watch second string dash chargers’ fortune!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
?
There once was a Charger of rhyme,
A Steed ‘Oh So Great’ for that time.
Yet now Chargers make Bolts,
San Diego makes Dolts,
With this funny Phillis and slime.
.
Man that was really bad I need to try again tomorrow
Guardian of the Gate to La La Land!
Gonsoulin, Taylor, Little, Wright, Gradishar, Atwater, Davis, and Sharpe...
Why are they not in the Hall...I just don't understand.
Mike Clark, the Kool-Aid makes you quite creative!!!
Good job, mate!
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Another,
If Bucky and KnowMo go down,
The Broncos will be safe and sound.
The chargers and Phyllis
Will meet Peyton Hillis
To the END ZONE the rock he will pound!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
I really can’t stand powder blues.
The uniform of feminine hues!
They laugh at our socks,
Although yellow stripes ROCK!
For when last we donned them, BOLTS LOSE!
Some think as a fan, I’m a lush.
That with 3 losses straight, Denver’s mush.
I drink, win or lose,
It’s whiskey I choose.
But on Sunday, Phil drinks Orange CRUSH!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
by HarvJNep2n on Nov 19, 2009 7:49 PM MST reply actions 1 recs
On sunday is when we’ll all see
Just how good the ol’ broncos can be
They’ll fight and they’ll war
And hopefully score
’Til tears flow from the eyes of LT
If Taylor Swift were to try and tackle me, I'd let her.
Highly inspirational.
If someone would read this great verse
Before kickoff time, then the curse
Would be lifted at last,
Charger wins would be past,
They’d return to SD in a hearse.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
That's a really great one! I love it!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
GOod job, KB!!!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
Who would have thought that poems could be fun???
In AP English 4, I used to despise the poetry section. Now, I know exactly why I learned this stuff. Brilliant. Thanks Mrs. Hart. I should write her a letter some time………
If Taylor Swift were to try and tackle me, I'd let her.
You have much to learn, young padawan....
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
FInally,
I’m just a little bit bummed.
I hope that John B thinks it’s fun
To toy with our hearts.
Don’t he know that it smarts,
When no Radio we’ve had since last Sun.?
OK that was a stretch….
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
OK one more....
Chargers like fall leaves
Are dead and brittle and wet.
This one’s a haiku.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
Definition of a charger:
A charger is a type of a steed,
Not as cool as a Bronco, indeed.
It’s also a thing
That makes batteries sing.
Or a kind of plate nobody needs.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
OK, really I'm done.
Thanks Lebowski. I needed this tonight. Each one is like a puzzle to be worked out. I’ve had fun!
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
I’ll try and say this without malice
Cause I truly don’t mean to be callous
But the QB with the spleen
Wearing number 17
Is a two hundred thirty pound phallus
"I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today" -- Wimpy J. Wellington
by Broncs Cheer on Nov 19, 2009 10:21 PM MST reply actions 1 recs
Bad, dude, simply awesome!!!
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Excellent
should have gone here. Rec’d.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
Excellent.
LMAO
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
If our limericks could win us the game
We’d be invincible. It’s a shame
That the rules on the field
Don’t allow us to wield
Our rhyme and our meter. That’s lame.
"I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today" -- Wimpy J. Wellington
by Broncs Cheer on Nov 19, 2009 10:54 PM MST reply actions 2 recs
Absolutely brilliant.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
As long as we win it won't matter.
Like the Yanks buying pitchers and batters,
The bolts have nice toys,
And they have pouty boys.
But we have the Spleen (not the Bladder!)
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
Wow it is late. My rhymes are more tired than I am. Goodnight.
-Harvey J. Neptune
"Practice doesn't make perfect. PERFECT practice makes perfect." - Vince Lombardi
Ode to a Charger Poet
If I wrote limericks for the Bolts
I’d wish we were playing the Colts
Cause no matter how hard
I’d pray to the Bard
I just wouldn’t be able to think of anything that rhymes with Bronco
"I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today" -- Wimpy J. Wellington
Then maybe you'd lisp like Lou Holtz!
Character may be manifested in the great moments but it is made in the small ones -- Philip Brooks
by KaptainKirk on Nov 19, 2009 11:20 PM MST up reply actions
very nice...
"I will gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today" -- Wimpy J. Wellington
by Broncs Cheer on Nov 20, 2009 9:36 AM MST up reply actions
!!
Good style!
"Aggression, discipline, accountability, effort" Brian Dawkins 9/29/2009
"Life is a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller
"He will always be a slave who does not know how to live upon a little" Horace
by PositivIntegral on Nov 20, 2009 9:49 AM MST up reply actions
this is amazingly fun...I'll give it a whirl
The Bolts think they have something for us, but their run D has shown to be porous. KnowMo runs in for 6, or he picks up the blitz for Orton to throw, and we’ll score thus.
"It's okay to eat fish, 'cause they don't have any feelings" - Kurt Kobain
by JChase8410 on Nov 20, 2009 12:36 AM MST via mobile reply actions
another
Phillip thought that he had lots of room, until he was hit from behind with a boom. Now flat on his face, who had laid him to waste? He heard from the crowd it was DOOOOOOM!!!
"It's okay to eat fish, 'cause they don't have any feelings" - Kurt Kobain
by JChase8410 on Nov 20, 2009 12:48 AM MST via mobile reply actions 1 recs
And
‘Tis the stuff of which legends are made
An aging champ starting to fade
And on the way up
With some firm giddy’up
Came a fighter most orange in shade.
Welcome in, streaking Bolts with a leer
Denver has the stomach to cheer
For a team briefly down
But a spark in our town
Would be to teach you the meaning of fear.
"Aggression, discipline, accountability, effort" Brian Dawkins 9/29/2009
"Life is a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller
"He will always be a slave who does not know how to live upon a little" Horace
by PositivIntegral on Nov 20, 2009 9:58 AM MST reply actions 1 recs
PI, nice, I liked the way you double stacked them..
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
while changing my son’s dirty diaper, I came up with this little cypher. 20 yards here and there, but with plenty of air, man I’d gladly trade Berger for Scifres
"It's okay to eat fish, 'cause they don't have any feelings" - Kurt Kobain
by JChase8410 on Nov 20, 2009 10:35 AM MST via mobile reply actions
chase, nice free verse limerick, man!
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
There once was a man
There once was a man from nantucket
A charger though, so he could S**k it
To Denver he’s back
Phyliss takes that sack
he’s awfullly too slow to duck it
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
- Thomas Alva Edison
"Success is not a place at which one arrives, but rather... the spirit with which one undertakes and continues the journey."
- Alex Noble
DBronx, 2nd line is my favorite, of course
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Man-Crush
Phil Rivers, us Bronco fans hate him.
And Nolan, we hope will frustrate him.
While dressed in Powder Blues,
And those nice matching shoes,
That Boomer guy just wants to date him.
- Jason
I gather speed by you f***ing with me - EV
Jubei, is he calling the game? Noooooooo
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
Let me give it a try.
The Chargers come in real confident,
Phil Rivers’ helmet, our D shall dent.
We’ll run up the score,
making the game a real bore,
and Bolts fans will go home all bent!
GO BRONCOS!! :)
"When you put on that jersey, the name on the front is more important than the name on the back." - "Miracle".
"Winning means you're willing to go longer, work harder, and give more than anyone else." - Vince Lombardi.
BC, bent and crying! good job!
"Wait, let me explain something to you...I'm the Dude. So, that's what you call me. You know, that, or 'His Dudeness,' or 'Duder,' or 'El Duderino,' if you're not into the whole brevity thing."
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