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Broncos Culture Exclusive Interview With Jay Cutler (A Parody)--Part II

 

This is part two of an exclusive interview that Jay Cutler granted to broncosculture.com. If you would like to read part I of the interview, then click it.

Broncos Culture (BC): With all due respect, Mr. Cutler, don't you respect the record that Jake Plummer had as a starter with the Broncos? Don't you respect Kyle Orton's record as an NFL starter? Don't you have to be somewhat understanding that there would be interest in Matt Cassel, who went 10 and 5 as a starter last year? I mean, this might sound like a putdown, and I don't want to hurt your fragile sensibilities, but you were 17-20 as a starter with the Broncos and never made the playoffs.

Jay Cutler (JC): We all know how Matt Cassel is doing as a starting quarterback this season, and he didn't make the playoffs last year either.

BC: Okay, that's fair. Does it give you any satisfaction to see Matt Cassel struggling in Kansas City?

JC: It fills my heart with glee.

BC: Okay, you have only addressed one part of that last question. It was a complex, multi-faceted question, the kind they ask at Vanderbilt. How do--

JC: Yes, I am aware of the type of questions they ask at Vanderbilt. Only geniuses attend Vandy. Cutler being a genius, but not a winner, at Vanderbilt.

BC: So, you would call yourself a genius?

JC: I don't know if I would, but I think my skill set speaks for itself. I am sure the media would say that I am a genius. BC: Please tell me how you feel about your record as the Broncos starter compared to the records of Plummer and Orton.

JC: Look, I didn't lose those 20 games in Denver by myself. The defense never helped me. We lost like seven running backs in Denver last year. I still made the Pro Bowl.

BC: In all fairness, you still failed to help lead your team to victory in that three-game meltdown at the end of the season.

JC: Well, the Denver Broncos never believed in me. That was the real problem.

BC: The Denver Broncos never believed in you? Many people would say that they believed too much in you. Did you see how up in arms the Broncos fans were when you were traded? You forced them to do that. Josh McDaniels said that he wanted you as the quarterback. Why couldn't you accept that, put the difficulty behind you, and suit up for the team that stood behind you so much, even in the face of a losing record as a starting quarterback? Mike Shanahan possibly commited career suicide as Denver's head coach for reshaping the "franchise" around you.

JC: Mike Shanahan was right about me, but he is not a part of the Denver Broncos anymore. If the Denver Broncos really had believed in me, they would not have been willing to trade me. Pat Bowlen always saw me as expendable.

BC: Well, you are entitled to your opinion even though most rational people see things differently and see your departure as more of a temper tantrum. Back to Plummer and Orton. The media and a number of fans were never behind these guys, but they have done nothing but win wearing the blue and orange. They didn't make any excuses.

JC: Yes, they won games, but Plummer choked in the AFC Championship back in January of 2006. Plus, they can't throw the deep ball like I can. Chicks dig the deep ball.

BC: Do you have a girlfriend?

JC: I like Kelly Clarkson. Especially the song "Breakaway."

BC: Curious! Let me change the subject, and I really appreciate your humility in answering these tough questions. Five of your last six losses have come against teams who were either in the playoffs last year or have a winning record this year. In your last 12 losses as a starting NFL quarterback, you have failed to achieve a quarterback rating above 80, and you have thrown only 14 touchdowns compared to 25 interceptions. This leads many to question your ability to win big games against good teams, and the touchdown to interception ratio in the losses leads people to question your ability to be a productive leader of a team in important games. How do you respond to that?

JC: You must not have been paying attention in week 2 when I led the Bears to victory over the Steelers. Last I checked, they are the defending Super Bowl champions. Yeah, talk to me next week after Kyle Orton has a repeat of his performance in Baltimore against the Steel Curtain. I had a QB rating over 100, I threw two touchdowns, and I didn't throw an interception against the Steelers. Why don't you mention that game?

BC: I was not denying that such a game took place, Mr. Cutler. I was asking you about your ability to win such games consistently or at least to put up decent numbers in such games.

JC: Well, I have already said that I didn't lose those games by myself. Last year, the Broncos defense was awful and I didn't have a healthy backfield with which to work. I still threw for over 4,500 yards and made the Pro Bowl.

BC: Congratulations on that! However, what I am basically hearing you say throughout the whole course of this interview is that you think you are a "franchise" quarterback. Quarterbacks have the biggest load to carry for a team. They must show leadership, maturity, and responsibility at all times. You have a different idea of what a franchise quarterback is. You want the full, blind faith from your coach, GM, owner, and fans that you are a talented, responsible leader, but you want to blame shift when things fall apart. Do you pay attention to your numbers against playoff caliber teams? What about the San Diego game last year?

JC: I threw for 350 yards and four touchdown in that game. I threw the touchdown that brought us within one, and I completed the two-point conversion that won us the game. That was against the champions from the AFC West last year, and that was one of my proudest moments, next to getting the meida to drink my Cutler Kool Aid.

BC: I was referring to week 17, the game that really mattered. The one that you lost 52-21, not the week 2 win that was won, let's be honest, very controversially.

JC: Quarterbacks don't give up 52 points.

 

To Be Continued...

This is a Fan-Created Comment on MileHighReport.com. The opinion here is not necessarily shared by the editorial staff of MHR

6 recs  |  Comment 13 comments  |  Add comment

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WOW

He sure is a Humble guy. way to throw your whole 2008 broncos team under the bus Jay. I sure don’t miss anything about that ego. glad he is a Bear. Glad we have Orton. When we win a superbowl this year I hope he chokes on his ego and his words

Embrace the other side, become the animal.

by mbudde33 on Nov 5, 2009 11:06 AM MST reply actions   0 recs

I do now :)

Embrace the other side, become the animal.

by mbudde33 on Nov 5, 2009 12:28 PM MST up reply actions   0 recs

I guess I could have read that in the title.

I feel silly now. haha

Embrace the other side, become the animal.

by mbudde33 on Nov 5, 2009 12:29 PM MST up reply actions   0 recs

heh ... it happens

to the best of us.

i tend to skim emails these days, seeing as how i get a gazillion of them. =/

by tunga77 on Nov 5, 2009 2:17 PM MST up reply actions   0 recs

Yeah

It was that funny. No worries mbudde.

Character may be manifested in the great moments but it is made in the small ones -- Philip Brooks

by KaptainKirk on Nov 5, 2009 4:58 PM MST up reply actions   0 recs

Nice parody BC...

enjoyed the humor in it.

by bchiper on Nov 5, 2009 11:44 AM MST reply actions   0 recs

Fun stuff

Thanks! Keep ’em coming!

by topnation on Nov 5, 2009 12:28 PM MST reply actions   0 recs

Funny stuff BC

I don’t necessarily like ragging on our old QB, but your stuff is very funny.

All you get from drafting the "best player available" is a team full of good football players.

Cotton McKnight: I'm being told that Average Joe's does not have enough players and will be forfeiting the championship match.
Pepper Brooks: It's a bold strategy, Cotton. Let's see if it pays off for 'em.

by orangeblood on Nov 5, 2009 1:56 PM MST reply actions   0 recs

A joke? No, this is obviously a real interview.

It just has a ring of plausibility running through it.

Rec’d. (And thanks for asking him my question.)

"Remember, it's only a game."

by robswenson on Nov 5, 2009 2:20 PM MST reply actions   0 recs

Alright! Alright! So I should read the title all the way through

LoL just giving him a taste of how broncos fan would react to those statements if he really did say them haha

Embrace the other side, become the animal.

by mbudde33 on Nov 5, 2009 2:29 PM MST reply actions   0 recs

Nice, BC

Character may be manifested in the great moments but it is made in the small ones -- Philip Brooks

by KaptainKirk on Nov 5, 2009 4:59 PM MST reply actions   0 recs

Thanks...

…for the kind comments, guys. I appreciate your feedback. I didn’t think I would actually psyche (sp?) anyone out with this:). My wife was joking with me saying that Jay Cutler might sue me for it. She may be right; that Cutler guy really knows how to hold a grudge. There is one more piece coming soon. Thanks for reading.

Please check out my blog, broncosculture.com. Followers needed.

by broncosculture on Nov 5, 2009 10:49 PM MST reply actions   0 recs


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