The Genie Wants Out
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 12, 2009 9:37 AM MDT
40 comments
Won't be long now.
All the pundits who've been predicting three or four wins for the Broncos, all the experts who've been labeling Josh McDaniels "clueless" and "in over his head" and all the blabbering twerps who've claimed the Broncos are the laughingstock of the league, they're about to smell the coffee. And it will be a bitter smell. A rude awakening. Electro-convulsive shock therapy. We're not talking some shaving cream in the hand while a feather tickles the nose. We're talking a half-frozen watermelon spiked on a sleeping man's jewels.
But the realization will dawn shyly at first. There will be denials. They'll dismiss the first series as a fluke and a product of the preseason. The Niners just had a hard time dusting off the cobwebs, they'll say. But how will they explain away the next series, when San Francisco can't complete a pass of more than 3 yards? What will they say when the Niners have no answer for the Broncos' three-man weave and Jabar Gaffney just 360 dunked it over the goal post? What will they say when it's the start of the second quarter and a Bronco pass still hasn't hit the ground?
Make no mistake: They'll deny and deny and deny. It's just the preseason, they'll say. The preseason is irrelevant. The Broncos overprepared. They took it much more seriously than San Francisco.
What they fail to understand is, Josh McDaniels has fooled them all. He's smarter than they are. He's already forgotten more about football than they'll ever know. And he's about to uncork the bottle and free the genie.
And then, as the preseason progresses, a seed of doubt will germinate in their otherwise barren little brains. It whispers, "Is it p...p...possible I was wr..wr...wrong?"
That question will be answered against Cincinnati. That's when McDaniels spikes the watermelon. That's when John Clayton makes like a two-by-four snapped by a kung-fu chop, as the cold realization hits, "I don't know what I'm talking about and never have." And as delicious as that will be, the expression on Jamie Dukes' face will be even more exquisite when the Broncos strip away his delusions and he admits, "Mother was right: I'm a complete fool."
It won't be long now.
This is a Fan-Created Comment on MileHighReport.com. The opinion here is not necessarily shared by the editorial staff of MHR
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Love the enthusiasm
but….perhaps just a little too much kool-aid? lol
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
- Thomas Alva Edison
"Success is not a place at which one arrives, but rather... the spirit with which one undertakes and continues the journey."
- Alex Noble
Pass the Pitcher AJ
and make mine a double
by BroncoSense72 on Aug 12, 2009 9:57 AM MDT up reply actions
you're the first person to claim I was drinking too much kool-aid
But who will guard the guards themselves?
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 12, 2009 4:34 PM MDT up reply actions
LMAO!
They will say, what in the world is wrong with McDaniels? He’s wearing his team out before the season starts. Why by mid season they will be so tired and listless that people will just run over them. Maybe, maybe not. But I will guarantee one thing, they will have something negative to say.
We’re talking a half-frozen watermelon spiked on a sleeping man’s jewels.
This image pleases me greatly.
J
by Jezru on Aug 12, 2009 10:32 AM MDT reply actions 1 recs
Hilliarious.
While I note the hyperbole, I must admit, this was an excellent read. Kudos, good sir!
"A player who conjugates a verb in the first person singular cannot be part of the squad, he has to conjugate the verb in the first person plural. We. We want to conquer. We are going to conquer. Using the word 'I' when you're in a group makes things complicated." ~ Wanderley Luxemburgo, 1999
thank you, I'm excited
But who will guard the guards themselves?
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 12, 2009 4:34 PM MDT up reply actions
I think that they are going to be good,
and I think that McD knows what he is talking about, but it will take time for players to develop, learn the system, and for rookies to learn to play in the NFL. When all of that comes together I don’t know. I do think that our patience will be rewarded eventually. I believe that I heard Mike Nolan say that it will take the OLBs about a year to know what they are doing. If I heard that quote properly, I think that illustrates what they are thinking at a lot of positions. Also, even a bad preseason may not be a good indicator. Remember Ryan Harris had a terrible first game against Houston last year and I was really concerned. My concern certainly proved to be unwarrented. Again, I think that we need to be patient. McD inherited quite a mess.
by Orange Crush II on Aug 12, 2009 11:51 AM MDT reply actions
yes we will
And it will be a beautiful sight to behold. Not unlike an armor-clad, large-breasted nymph riding a dragon named Vengeance.
Woe is them!
But who will guard the guards themselves?
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 12, 2009 4:36 PM MDT up reply actions 1 recs
I laughed so hard
when I saw that song on Guitar Hero. Ahahahaha. Good times…
It's Orange Crush time. And no I am NOT talking about the soft-drink.
Which I beg the question: "Can liquid really be... soft?"
3 TE Set = 3 losses or less.
Do it MickeyD... 13-3!!
I think 9 wins would shock enough people
So I believe in Josh McDaniels. I think he has a chance to break Don Shula’s all-time win record. I did some rough calculations and I believe he needs to average 10 wins a season and then retire at 62. So if he can get 9 this year, he’s on his way. Right? He’s never been a part of loser. So I think 9 wins is about right. That ought to out Jamie Dukes for the clown he is.
But who will guard the guards themselves?
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 12, 2009 4:40 PM MDT up reply actions
HAHAHA
Pretty funny stuff… U forgot Cris Carter too, he’s been Broncos bashing all year, he has actually said that the Lions should not fear of having the #1 pick again cuz Denver has done some pretty dumb things this offseason and they are a shoe-in for it (but idiot doesnt realize we dont even hav our own pick). Truth is, we hav so much talent spread out, and we hav so much quality depth, that it is improbable for us to be horrible this yr
I wish it were were true
Unfortunately, you’re living in a dreamworld…
Not about the Broncos, all that is very likely, it’s the MSM pundits I’m talking about. After the Cin game they will be saying, "Josh is great! We’ve been on board with his ideas all along, remember when I said …Blah….blah. Well, what I really meant was..blah…blah…blah. Or they’ll pull the “they got lucky” routine, but that just digs the hole deeper.
Haha Great Write Up AJF
Although I have to admit when I saw your Fanpost heading I assumed you had traped one of your interns in your office again. :)
Really
I was hoping Genie was an exotic Island girl assigned as a temp.
"You give 100 percent in the first half of the game, and if that isn't enough, in the second half you give what's left." – Yogi Berra
"No, I'm from Iowa, I only work in outer space."
that's a good idea
I wonder if there’s a university on Fiji Island.
But who will guard the guards themselves?
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 12, 2009 9:05 PM MDT up reply actions
Too many? Define that please.
Perpetual motion machine = Too many thong days at the office
But who will guard the guards themselves?
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 12, 2009 9:06 PM MDT up reply actions
Upon further consideration
you are correct sir – “too many thong days” is an oxymoron…or an oxycontin….or an oxymoron on oxycontin
by SlowWhiteGuy on Aug 12, 2009 9:12 PM MDT up reply actions
Calling out local Denver media
Sandy and Mike
Woody
Klis
Porkchop
Get ready to eat it
"Kool-Aid Kool Aid, Tastes Great, We Want Kool Aid, Can't Wait"
by littletinybroncos on Aug 12, 2009 9:41 PM MDT reply actions
Nice signature! The name says it all.
It's Orange Crush time. And no I am NOT talking about the soft-drink.
Which I beg the question: "Can liquid really be... soft?"
3 TE Set = 3 losses or less.
Do it MickeyD... 13-3!!
I guess I prefer to just sit back...
and laugh my arse off at those fools!!!
The Genie must be let loose!!
WOW
Now that is optimism!!! Just remember this a league that has had only two undefeated teams in it’s history… in the meantime it is all too common for a team to underachieve for a multitude of reasons, the thing is "can you still be a fan when they go 6-10 or start out 2-5 when they were supposed to be better? I think it’s great to hope for the best!!! But it isn’t such a bad thing to be prepared for less than that!!! Watch and enjoy the game for what it is win or lose and you’ll capture the true essence of being an NFL team fan. Expect 19-0 and you are setting yourself up for a lil tiny bit of pain!!! But on the other hand a boat load of optimism never really killed anyone… right? 13-3 go Broncos!!!!!
"even a stopped clock is right twice a day" Yosemite Sam
by lovewatchinthegame on Aug 13, 2009 12:22 AM MDT reply actions
lol
great stuff, AJF!! You’ve been up and down on McD before, so I imagine today you are feeling exceptionally confident in him……or maybe getting excited to put on the jerseys and start rooting.
MHR is getting me fired up for the season with posts like this….love it!! While a fervent Kool Aid drinker myself, I am expecting some glitch to happen that reinforces the MSMs take on McD. It may be a loss to Cle or Cincy, or something else, but after it happens and the team rallies……its all she wrote. I imagine the watermelon coming down on Clayton and Dukes every Sunday night when they get the scores and say, “Aw crud, I gotta avoid this team again??”
maybe early on
In the past, I’ve claimed that Josh McDaniels represents an unknown. And very early on – like maybe the first quarter of this year or before I joined this site – I was less enthusiastic about the hire. Like many, I’d hoped for a more defensive-minded coach. I also questioned the wisdom of some of his draft day moves.
But I’m sold now.
The more I get to know him and the more research I’ve done, the more confident I become. I wish I could find the interview that Joe Ellis did with The Couch Potatoes on Mile High Sports Radio (for some reason, they haven’t put it up on their site). In his interview, Ellis talked about the interview process and described how McDaniels set himself apart from the other candidates. I can’t remember any of the details other than that I was impressed and it enhanced my confidence.
McDaniels is a football genius. And although we might not have the most talented team in the league, I believe that his preparation, system, strategy and tactics will make up for some of the talent deficiencies. Does that mean I think the Broncos will go 13-3? Unfortunately, no. But I believe that the Broncos will be successful enough to surprise most less-informed observers. Hence, the watermelon.
But who will guard the guards themselves?
by Agent Jerry Fletcher on Aug 13, 2009 7:16 AM MDT up reply actions
With a looong straw
I sippeth the Kool-Aid from Denver down here in Sooner country. I love it, mm mm good.
All the Chiefs and Cowboys fans have been telling me how my Broncos are going to be last place and how McD stinks. I have a lot of crow ready to prepare them come December.
Before I finish, PLEASE do what you can to help Floyd get in the Hall Of Fame. I have writen letters and sent emails and signed the petition.
Come on guys, let’s do it and get Floyd in the Hall.
Make those miracles happen - Jon Keyworth
I DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE!
Peyton Hillis is also referred to in early Greek mythology by his other names such as Zeus or Poseidon.
Crow Farm
You guys just gave me an idea for a great way to make some extra scratch…I have 8 acres and if I can get enough “futures” orders I will start a Crow Farm…We can have them delivered to all of our favorites along with spice packs and cooking instructions…
We have a tough schedule, but
an 8-8 record would be huge to me this year.
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
I'm with you Zappa
Just play hard, show us something for 4 quarters and stay in the game, I’ll be happy. Then look out in 2010.
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