The Dude's Mail Sack: Is Kyle Orton Eye Candy?
Mile High Report blogger TJ "The Dude" Johnson posts The Dude's Mail Sack on Thursdays, in which he takes your questions about the state of the Denver Broncos. Got a burning question? Drop it into the The Dude's "Sack." or visit the homepage of Mile High Report.
Hey, TJ, just give me the stats! I've noticed that with the signings of Jamal Williams, Jarvis Green, and Justin Bannan, the Broncos are getting a little long in the tooth on the defensive line. Are these guys really the answer? I mean they are really really old.
---Mike, Norman, Oklahoma
Mike: Quit whining for Gerald McCoy already! Bannan (age 30) stands the greatest chance, but you're right. In terms of the NFL, this group is more seasoned than an Al Davis jumpsuit. Josh McDaniels knows very well that in the games the Broncos lost last year, it was primarily the run defense that broke down. Green is more situational, but both Bannan and Williams, if healthy, won't allow the kind of yards on the ground that you saw this year. Here's a stat for you. The Broncos were worst in the league in allowing 6.70 yard per carry off of left tackle. You can bet Bannan, to whom the Broncos gave the biggest contract, will end up seeing some time there.
In case you were wondering, defensive tackles generally begin declining after age 31 and defensive ends around the age of 30 (Bill Romanowski and Chuck Norris never decline), so the Broncos are taking some risk with these players. But make no mistake, the Broncos just got better with these signings. Starting Kenny Peterson (released yesterday) was not an option going into 2010.
By the way, last year, after the Broncos signed so what seemed like 1,000 running backs in free agency. The prevailing wisdom was that they would go defense in the draft. Then they went out and drafted Knowshon Moreno, This shocked many people, including many of us here at MHR. This year, they've signed several defensive linemen, and are expected to draft an offensive player like Dez Bryant or Mike Iupati. Could we be looking at a defensive lineman like Dan Williams?
TJ, I'm a 26-year old aerobics instructor and I think Kyle Orton's beard is extremely sexy. What do you think the chance is that the Broncos sign him to a long term contract? I'd like to keep this eye candy in Denver for a long time.
---Charlie, Colorado Springs, Colorado
Charlie: I like your style. While most aerobics instructors are eyeing the likes of Tom Brady and Matty Ryan or recently-on-the-trading block Brady Quinn, you clearly don't follow the crowd. Facial hair aside, the Broncos recently tendered Orton with a first-round-draft pick, which was their way of saying they'd like Kyle to stick around for another year. If someone wants to get Orton from the Broncos, they're going to have to put together what would amount to a long term commitment to Orton, which I don't believe will happen.
However, it's unlikely they'll lock him up long term, for two reasons. First, and foremost, it doesn't make good business sense until we see how the lockout evolves. Second, and more important to the Broncos, they want to see how Orton progresses in his 2nd year under the McDaniels system. Brady himself said it takes two or even three years to begin to grasp this offensive system. Matt Cassel, let's face facts, had several years of studying the system before he got his break. So, we should probably give your eye candy another season to see how far he can come.
If McDaniels senses that Orton is regressing in the coming year, you can bet he won't waste time putting in his replacement, which will either be Tom Brandstater or a QB the Broncos will draft (or sign) this year between rounds 3-6. Conversely, if McDaniels believes Orton is the guy for this system and the Broncos win, let's say, 11 games, I think you will see them lock him up. Sweet, indeed.
I'm not sure how many Super-Bowl-Winning QBs have had facial hair, but who knows, maybe I'll run this down someday.
Dude! Love Mile High Report! Do you think we'll draft Tim Tebow? I am a rabid Gators fan, and the kid could run the Wild Horses like nobody's business while he develops under Kyle Orton for a year or two. Let's saddle him up already. Who's gonna ride our wild horses?
--Bubba, Gainsville, Florida
Bubba: rabid is a relative term, but knowing football in that neck of the woods, I'll take you mean it literally. The only thing more talked about in the last month than Tim Tebow's religion is his place in the draft. With such a varying opinion on the guy, who really knows. It's rumored that Denver is looking at the kid. And we know that McDaniels doesn't mind a little quarterback challenge. With more pressing needs at linebacker, wide receiver (you know why), and offensive line, it's hard to think McDaniels would draft him with the 1st or 2nd pick. However, if Brandon Marshall and Tony Scheffler are traded and additional 2nd-round draft picks come Denver's way, it could get really interesting. By the way, rabid gators and wild horses are a deadly combination.
TJ, why do you constantly mock the Raiders? Every time you write anything at Mile High Report, you attack Davis and the Raiders for no reason. Al Davis is a treasure.
--Raider Cindy, Black Hole, California
Cindy: Let me guess. You must be one of those Raiders fans that say they go to every home game but really just listen on the radio during the blackouts. Have you seen the Raiders lately? Why, you ask. Why not? Until Raiders fans lose their fetishes for leather, face paint, and bobble-head skulls, it will be hard to stop. Raiders fans make Alice Cooper look like Buddy Holly. And until the team stops ranking its draft board according to 40-yard dash times, it's just too easy. If you haven't heard, Taylor Mays runs pretty fast. Faster than Darren McFadden or Darrius Heyward-Bey? Al will draft Mays just to find out.
The treasure is the inventor of the franchise tag. Otherwise, no one would stay in Oakland.
TJ, what's the most overlooked stat in football? For me, it's the number of times Peyton Manning complains to the referees per quarter.
--Thor, Bear River, Wyoming
Thor: First, I''m betting you're the kind of guy that speaks softly but carries a big...hammer. That's why you are a Broncos fan. Peyton Manning does indeed put up a high Yards After Complaint (YAC) statistic. Regarding your question, the most overlooked stat is field position. Turnovers are huge, but they get a lot of press. Field position is rarely mentioned, and you never see it in the box score. That's why I keep track of average starting field position throughout the year. It correlates to winning. There's a reason you don't kick to Josh "they call me Mr." Cribbs.
Lebowski, if you were locked in a closed door, coaches-only meeting with Tom Cable, what would you say to him?
--Sarah, Aurora, Colorado
Sarah: That's easy. I'd say, "I want my lawyer. Now."
This is a Fan-Created Comment on MileHighReport.com. The opinion here is not necessarily shared by the editorial staff of MHR
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65 comments
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Comments
Great sack, Dude!
I thought the questions were a little hairy there at first, and I was wondering how you were going to handle it. But your razor wit was up to the task and you smoothed things out nicely, despite a few wrinkles here and there…
All in all, quite awesome!
There's a big hard sun, beating on the big people, in the big hard world.
formerly Styg-like
by Jeremy Bolander on Mar 10, 2010 11:41 PM MST reply actions 3 recs
wow Jeremy....just wow. lol
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
The guy formerly known as ZAPPA
Oh I see what you've done there
Flagged……for awesomeness.
by T.Dot_Bronco on Mar 13, 2010 5:14 PM MST up reply actions
thanks, figured if Paige can do it, we ought to as well
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
I think I just found my new favorite weekly article! Great job T.J.!
Hey, is that Charlie from Colorado Springs a former Marine Reserve? If he is, than i’d be willing to bet about $100 that he was my High School QB, lol. Haven’t heard from him in about three years, but it wouldn’t surprise me to find him on here, football fanatic he is.
"I have no right, by anything I do or say, to demean a human being in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think of him; it is what he thinks of himself." - Antoine de Exupery
He, I thought Charlie was a "she"....hmmmm
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
The guy formerly known as ZAPPA
Charlie the aerobics instructor is a man? Oh boy, this thread could go downhill fast.
In my opinion.
I just thought that maybe Charlie was originally
From San Francisco LOL
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
- Thomas Alva Edison
"Success is not a place at which one arrives, but rather... the spirit with which one undertakes and continues the journey."
- Alex Noble
Charlie Don't Surf!
Character may be manifested in the great moments but it is made in the small ones -- Philip Brooks
by KaptainKirk on Mar 11, 2010 12:01 PM MST up reply actions
Charlie didn't indicate anything other than the age...
Something tells me, however, I might be hearing from Charlie again, however.
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
Lol. Well I guess we'll just wait and see then.
"I have no right, by anything I do or say, to demean a human being in his own eyes. What matters is not what I think of him; it is what he thinks of himself." - Antoine de Exupery
by Alexander Wall on Mar 13, 2010 1:58 AM MST up reply actions
If he is...
…wouldn’t that violate the don’t ask don’t tell policy?
Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from weak minds. - Albert Einstein
Once we accept our limits, we go beyond them. - Albert Einstein
Awesome post, Dude. +1
A mail sack series is a great idea. It’s like Woody’s mailbag……….. but good.
If Taylor Swift were to try and tackle me, I'd let her.
PS3 ID: broncomaniac6
LOL
"Brandon Marshall will be a happy BRONCO WR in 2010"
Broncotodd - 2009
"Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passion, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence."
John Adams
+1...Perfect KB
-Stick to the fight when you are hardest hit - it's when things seem worst that you must not quit!
by BroncoSense72 on Mar 11, 2010 7:13 AM MST up reply actions
Priceless
This is awesome, TJ
A vision without a plan is just a dream. A plan without a vision is drudgery. But a vision with a plan can change the world.
Great idea TJ...I'll be looking forward to this one each week!!!
-Stick to the fight when you are hardest hit - it's when things seem worst that you must not quit!
Good stuff. Looks like I'll have to keep doing this.
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
“Josh McDaniels knows very well that in the games the Broncos lost last year, it was primarily the run defense that broke down.”
Dude – most of the Bronco losses were the result of poor offense and terrible special teams.
You know that! Was the run D good in 2009? No and it needs to be fixed. But overall, our sputtering O was a MUCH bigger liability than our D.
In my opinion.
+1
"Space is big. You just won't believe how vastly, hugely, mind- bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it's a long way down the road to the chemist's, but that's just peanuts to space."
"It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes" Douglas Adams
by orange&blue_aussie on Mar 11, 2010 7:29 AM MST up reply actions
Really???
Orton throws for 400+ yards against KC…we got blown out because the D gave up 300+ yards RUSHING.
You’re statement is not factual and misleading. The Broncos run D during the 2-8 stretch was HORRIBLE
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
The guy formerly known as ZAPPA
at home..250+ rushing yards against the Raiders at home and we lost by 1 point......
JaMArcus freakin Russell drove down the field to score the winning touchdown. Let’s blame Orton there too….“we should have gone for it on 4th down”…right…we should have been able to STOP Ryan Leaf..err…JaMArcus Russell
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
The guy formerly known as ZAPPA
by Tim Lynch on Mar 11, 2010 7:32 AM MST up reply actions 1 recs
Agree
The offense certainly wasn’t anything to write home about but the RUN defense was a much bigger liability than the O.
"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race" Calvin Coolidge
Thank God for that!
Or the Chefs would have had 400+ yards rushing!!!!
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
The guy formerly known as ZAPPA
Orton also threw 3 picks,
1 of which was returned for a TD. The game turned on that play. I believe it was tied at that point in the game. Another of his int. was also in Denver territory, and led to a Chiefs TD. He threw 50 some times, so yeah he threw for a lot of yards, but that was hardly a good performance. And the offense had multiple chances to put the Raiders game away, like 1st and goal at the 2, and they didn’t do it. It should never have come down to a game-winning drive by the Raiders. The offense was terrible in many games this season. The run-defense was terrible at the end of the year, but the offense was bad most of the year, even during the 6-0 stretch.
All True, McG, but in the 8 losses, the average yards/game given up on the ground
I think was about 150. I’ll have to go and find this stat, but I’m quite sure of it.
Even so, the offense did stutter.
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
They're related...
we gave up a lot on the ground because teams were running a lot because they were ahead.
They were ahead because our offense was anemic…but that was no different than when we were winning. Our D gave our O many more opportunities in the first part of the season by not getting run all over and allowing opposing Os to ice games with the run.
Because Montana has no professional sports, I gotta support the land of my birth.
Socrates was once executed for 'trolling'.
^Needs explaining: don't call someone asking uncomfortable, slightly antagonistic questions trolls. In all odds they probably just want to learn. It's real easy to differentiate a 'Socratic' post from a trolling one (unless you're a resident of WCG).
^Needs further explaining: I have yet to post anything on WCG, don't worry, I'm not trying to rationalize anything I've done. I've just lurked over there and man, they are the model of post-peloponnesian war Athens.
They arent really related . Great defenses dont get behind that many points PERIOD !!!
3 tds to Peyton 3 to Mcnabb
You cant go on the road against good teams and do that
You then have huge run totals and many were off of big runs on 3rd and longs .
Those home games great defenses dont give up that many rushing yards at home against anyone no matter what the offense is doing.
Was the offense anemic or did the coach early on see that the defense was outstanding and formulate the gameplan around a defensive minded game considering his QB was injured to to start the season ?
That last game against the Raiders we used up a crucial timeout in the 4th to give the defense a blow because they couldnt get the worst qb rotation in the league off the field .
If we dont burn that timeout then on that throw deep to scheff by Orton we have a timeout and couldve trotted out Prater for the potential game winner . If you look back over the season you can see a lot of instances where we played to the defense sometimes at the expense of the offense .
In the last game against the Chiefs McDaniel just went for it and the offense passed . I really think that was a test of just how aggressive we could be . Orton made two mistakes but overall both he and the scheme passed the test . I think we will see a offense like the one we saw in the last game next season with more runs mixed in .
I dont think you will see Josh leave it in the defenses hands as much as he did this year again .
Great post, Dude
And with as fast as it jumped into double digit rec’s I’d say the MHR community agrees.
Oh . . . wait . . . fast . . . I forgot, I’m on the west coast, for some people this post has been up for like 3-4 hours. ;-p
Love the Raider comment.
We live in an age when instant gratification isn't fast enough
fantastic post
great commentary, great wit, great idea, and yet another reason to keep tuning into MHR. I have looked at similar sites for my other teams (d’backs, suns), and MHR stands well above these sites.
I would also say that the sputtering offense was a problem, but fixing the interior line should help that, as well as another year of Orton at the helm. It is a complicated offense to grasp. Run defense was a huge concern, and I hope we took long strides toward fixing it. A punter would be nice, too. Thinking back to the training camp incident last year, if we can’t find a good punter maybe BMarsh (if he’s still around) could try some double duty there?
thanks, AZ, you ought to consider the nuggs...I'm just saying :-)!
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
Sorry Dude, but
I really think you dropped a ball on this mail sack.
I hope to see more of your mail sack next week…
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
The guy formerly known as ZAPPA
“My father would womanize, he would drink, he would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Some times he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy, the sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical, summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we’d make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds, pretty standard really. At the age of 12 I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen, a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum, it’s breathtaking, I suggest you try it…”
Certainly needs to be a recurring feature.
You’re making a name for yourself Dude. I hope that Oscar didn’t go to your head because we can’t afford to lose anymore writing talent at the MHR. It’s like a freaking farm system for the general internet punditry profession.
by legendarywalton on Mar 11, 2010 9:23 AM MST reply actions
Thanks, Walton. Good to see you back!
How is that NBA season going for you?
Ready for the refs to give Koby some pretend calls again so they can get the Nuggs in 6 games?
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
Thanks TJ. I really liked this column
Way better than that “other guy’s” mailbag. Keep them raider jokes flowing. It NEVER gets old to laugh at the living dead Davis or why the field a track team for football games.
I'm glad we had this talk. -- TJ Johnson
The Raiders provide enough material for everyone. Other guy? hahah
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
Keeping Raider Hating In Context
… as much as I love to make fun of the Faders (I was actually raised by a Fader Loving Father) it’s hard to do when we continue to be embarrassed by them AT HOME.
Just saying …
"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race" Calvin Coolidge
Especially because all fader fans are loud mouth impotent jerks!
your father notwithstanding.
Verbose in style, dispersion of thought, procrastination in life.
The guy formerly known as ZAPPA
lol
Mine’s a Raider fan too, so i’m having a little trouble with your premise. ; )
"All we're trying to do is win the *********** game!" -- Josh MF McDaniels tearing into his offensive line after three false starts in the red zone. The tirade turned the tide of the game, and the Broncos dominated from that point on.
by broncosmontana on Mar 13, 2010 9:58 AM MST up reply actions
SSMT, Will Do. It's all in good fun.
Like our Limerick war we had with Silver and Black Pride last year.
Rich Gannon haunts me still.
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
It's male not mail.
Character may be manifested in the great moments but it is made in the small ones -- Philip Brooks
Love it!
My wife read your post and Bolander’s comment and she said you’re NUTS!
"I can do all things through HIM who gives me strength"
"Death had a near Chuck Norris experience."
by BroncoCountryHawaii on Mar 11, 2010 12:15 PM MST reply actions
Hey Hawaii, if women are readying MHR, then I've accomplished on of my goals.
Tell her that Bolander puts me up to this!
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.
I think we need to re name this section
mail sack is too close to male sack!
just teasing a bit~
Davis and Sharpe to the Hall!
"Teamwork divides the task and double the success."
- Unknown
lol
"All we're trying to do is win the *********** game!" -- Josh MF McDaniels tearing into his offensive line after three false starts in the red zone. The tirade turned the tide of the game, and the Broncos dominated from that point on.
by broncosmontana on Mar 13, 2010 9:57 AM MST up reply actions
GOOD GRAVY!
How did I ever miss this excellent post!?! A week without a Lebowski Raiders swipe is a humorless week indeed.
Congratulations on the Oscarâ„¢ win by the way!!
"All we're trying to do is win the *********** game!" -- Josh MF McDaniels tearing into his offensive line after three false starts in the red zone. The tirade turned the tide of the game, and the Broncos dominated from that point on.
And
I’m a 26-year old aerobics instructor and I think Kyle Orton’s beard is extremely sexy.
This line alone got a major LMFAO from your Montana buddy. Very very Dude.
"All we're trying to do is win the *********** game!" -- Josh MF McDaniels tearing into his offensive line after three false starts in the red zone. The tirade turned the tide of the game, and the Broncos dominated from that point on.
by broncosmontana on Mar 13, 2010 10:03 AM MST up reply actions
Al Davis is a treasure...
not everything ancient can be classified as treasure. There’s many reason it’s called the black hole, one of which is that’s the place stars go to die. The other reasons have been rated R by the MPAA.
That is quite the sack you got there Dude. I wonder if you don’t touch it for the week how full it will get by Thursday.
Since you like linking to music...
from the song “I’m your mailman”
I can come in any kind of weather
that’s because my sack is made of leather
I don’t mess with keys or locks
I just stuff it in your box
I’m your
mailman
"People who live in glass houses...shouldn't."
Jay, I think I've found something here!
The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that.

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