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Notes on Peyton Hillis

"Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Peyton Hillis can kill 100 percent of whatever  he wants."
 
"Superman owns a pair of Peyton Hillis pajamas. "
 
Ask Peyton Hillis if blood is thicker than water..he will show you.

 
"Peyton Hillis is the reason why Waldo is hiding. "
 
"Peyton Hillis has the eyes of an angel and the soul of a saint.  He keeps them in a footlocker under his bed. "
 
"If it looks like chicken, tastes like chicken, and feels like chicken but if Peyton Hillis says its beef, then it's beef. "
 
"The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Peyton Hillis didn't run over you in your sleep. "
 
"Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Peyton Hillis' PC will crash. "
 
"Peyton Hillis puts the laughter in manslaughter. "
 
"When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Peyton Hillis. "
  
"Peyton Hillis died two years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him. "
 
"Peyton Hillis does not hunt because the word hunting implies the possibility of failure. Peyton Hillis goes killing. "
 
"Peyton Hillis' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd; no one fools Peyton Hillis."
 
"When Peyton Hillis exercises, the machine gets stronger. "
 
“Most people fear the Reaper.  Peyton Hillis considers him a promising rookie.”
 
“There are two kinds of people in the world… people that suck and Peyton Hillis.”
 

“Peyton Hillis doesn’t breath, he holds air hostage.”
 
“Peyton Hillis does not sleep.  He waits.”
 
“Lightning never strikes twice in one place because Peyton Hillis is looking for it.”

"God said: "Let there be light."Peyton Hillis said: "Say please!" 

 

The above was stollen from a tribute to Chuck Norris on the occasion of his 70th B'day.

It fits #22 better


                                                                                                                                                                                                               

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