FanPost

BREAKING NEWS!(satire)

According to the A BS P -

British Petroleum(BP) has since been found to be under estimating the magnitude of the oil eruption at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico by a factor of 20, President Obama has redubbed the disaster the Oakland Raider. 

Obama, in a press conference this morning, stated, "A disaster of this size and scope must be name in accordance with a disaster of similar size and scope.  There was nothing else in all of human history that comes close, except perhaps the Oakland Raider franchise.  Thus, by decree of Executive Order, this disaster will now be called the Oakland Raider oil disaster. Thank you and God Bless America."

Experts around the globe agreed that since the eruption is clearly the worst manmade disaster in all of human history, it is appropriate to attach the disaster to something tangible, something recognizable as horrifying. 

The oil field is estimated at about 100 million barrels, which gives BP just under three years to get this situation under control - given the current rate of 95,000 barrels per day being "leaked" into the Gulf.  That is likely more time than the Oakland Raiders have, given the age of their glorious leader. 

However, BP has some hope they can contain this, while Raider fans can only despair.

This is a Fan-Created Comment on MileHighReport.com. The opinion here is not necessarily shared by the editorial staff of MHR

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