Predictions Through the Mists of Time

I got out the tarot cards, the rune stones, sacrificed a chicken to Nostradamus, and polished up the crystal ball, in hopes of figuring out the 2010 Bronco season. Aside from viewing soggy tea leaves, the future revealed itself right after listening to an old, rebroadcast of Art Bell, as I was scaling Himalayan peaks to consult a Buddhist sage. I was informed in a trance that there were four areas of the team that would reveal themselves, if I sent my box tops in, quite the epiphany.  Even though my website charges $19.99 plus shipping and handling, (the order doubles with separate S & H) for this revealed enlightenment, being a loyal MHR’r , I decided to inform this community as to the true meaning of life, especially since sales are slow.    This message from the nether regions was communicated in four parts: 1) Coaching; 2) Offense; 3) Defense; and 4) Special Teams.

COACHING:

Grasshopper, you must understand that your head coach last year was a rookie, who made very good decisions, as well as some questionable ones. He was unable to completely open up the playbook because everyone was new to the system. By his own admission, the Broncos ran only 60% of the playbook. This season he will no longer be a rookie, he will have a better understanding of who his players are and what their strengths and weaknesses are. He also has a better understanding of the competition in the AFC West; expect better game planning against the Chefs, Faiders, and Super Sparklers.  He will be able to run 90 to 95% of his playbook and this will lead to more Offensive success. And yes, they will make those nasty 3rd and ones.

CoachMcD made an excellent choice of replacing the departed Nolan with the former LB coach Martindale. Wink has been inducted into the Ryan family Clan of Aggressive, Defensive Geniuses. Think 1984-1985 Chicago Bears, 1986- 1994 Philadelphia Eagles, the current version of the New Jersey Jets. He has the D’s back and with the addition of the three wise men, talented and tough FA acquisitions, we now have a Dline that has leadership, talent, and emerging, experienced, youth as backup. Expect his play calling to be aggressive, especially with Ayres starting, and the ever ethereal Haggan on the inside.  The stars will align for the Front Seven. The Broncos fans will not have seen this quality of Defense since the halcyon days of the late 70’s Orange Crush. 

OFFENSE:

The Sages have informed me that; Kyle Orton will have a spectacular season, barring dislocated index fingers, and ankle injuries against Washington Redskins. He will have a much improved running game as support, especially with the addition of Saint Thomas Demayrius and Sir Eric of Decker. Both of those big kids can block, and block well as rookies, and with the addition of the Marquis of Branson possibly in the backfield or in the slot, and with an O line fortified with a center 20lbs. bigger than last year’s model,  those infuriating 3rd and ones will be relegated to the mists of the past.

The passing game will be improved for three reasons. 1) The team has a full year of experience in the occult mysteries of the McD system, so there will be more playing and less thinking. (After scrying the talking Doc Bear, I have been informed that familiarity breeds touchdowns). 2) KO has a much better grasp of the offense, and coordinated with the Magical McD, 90 to 95% of the “Book of Plays” will be available to them. 3)  Although the Marshall of Brandon has departed east for a quest for gold, our WR core will be fine with Jabbar Gaffney ready to start, Brandon Lloyd or Saint Thomas as the faithful sidekick, with 3rd cornerbacks having to cover a newly emancipated Eddie Royal in the slot. Supporting them is a collection of promising youngsters and elder statesmen capable of fulfilling their needed duties.

However, there is an unsettling conjunction of Mars and Saturn for the Offensive line and Tight ends. Injuries abound and dark forces are conspiring to weaken the vanguard of the team. The ryans are injured and hopefully recovered to begin the season. Chris Kuper seems to be ready to really perform, but there is mystery surrounding the Rookie Walton and his ability to do the job, and Left guard is a position veiled in a pre-training camp fog. Should Seth Olsen start or should we start two rookies on the oline with the Scarab of Utah? The magic eight ball says ask again later.   The good news is the Tight Ends will be the caterpillar tractors of the line; unfortunately, they will also be the caterpillar tractors of the receiving corp. 

Running back will see steady improvement, I asked the Swami what to expect from Knowshon Moreno. He responded” would you believe 2000 yards and a pro bowl berth?” I said that would be very hard to believe. He then said” well then would you believe 1700 yards and tickets to the pro bowl?”  I told him I was still skeptical, He then said” then would you believe 1200 yards and a Kno show to the pro bowl?” That sounds more like it, of course, I could have missed it by that much. C Buckhalter will once again play well but he will only appear in 13 games due to age and injuries.  Arrington becomes a solid contributor. Toney Baker plays well enough for the practice squad, and the rest don’t matter.

DEFENSE

I drew the hanging man card for the Defense and it symbolizes what they will be doing to opposing offenses and QBs this year. Although the fates have not yet spoken, olines are going to start the season doubling Doom, only to be hit with safety blitzes, cornerback blitzes, Mario Haggan and Robert Ayres. With the increased pressure from the Dline with J Williams in on 1st and 2nd downs, Bannan pressuring and a rotation of others, we will be less susceptible to the short dump off passes. The wandering DJ Williams will still stink in coverage but it will matter less. With our newfound depth, we won’t be tiring out as much in the latter parts of games, as well as the latter part of the season.

Nobody will be saying “where’s the beef” when they look at the front seven and this alone will wear out any of our opponents at Mile High this season. Having another team totally gassed by the third quarter will help in the W column. Size does matter.

Returning from my trip to Delphi, I have it on good account that the strongest unit on the team is the defensive backfield. B Dawk and Champ will be the same monsters they have always been, there’s no quit in either of them. Goodman will get his 5-6 ints, and the Ouija board tells me two things; the first is that Darcel McBath is really on the rise, and Alphonzo Smith has 15 ints and goes to the pro bowl just to piss off McGeorge.

SPECIAL TEAMS

We have a happy problem on STs. We now have JJ Arrington, Eddie Royal, Kenny McKinley, Alphonzo Smith and now both Perrish Cox, and Syd Quan Thompson to compete for Punt and Kickoff returns. Who knows who will be the anointed one? Only the Shadow knows.

Field goals will fly through the uprights regularly, but kick offs and punts will be under the influence of Uranus, i.e., wait and see.

In Summary, I inquired as the final record for the team’s regular season. Edgar Caycee was sacked out on the couch, and I gently brushed his shoulder and asked. His response was; “Wake me up when the season starts!”