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Denver Broncos Fail to Make Showing at 2014 Pro Bowl

With the new non-conferenced format supposedly injecting new life into what has been one of the most unwatchable games during recent football seasons. Sadly, the Denver Broncos did nothing to raise interest in the game and failed to make any sort of mark in this year's All-Star contest. In fact, it's fair to say that the Denver Broncos never showed up to this year's Pro Bowl.

The last time a Denver Bronco was seen in the Pro Bowl....
The last time a Denver Bronco was seen in the Pro Bowl....
Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

When Denver's Peyton Manning, Demaryius Thomas, Matt Prater, Julius Thomas, and Louis Vasquez were selected to the Pro Bowl this year, optimism was high that these five outstanding players would contribute to the new draft style Pro Bowl. Which player would go where? Was Peyton a match more for what Team Jerry Rice or for Team Dion? During NFL Network's coverage of the Pro Bowl draft, not ONE Denver Bronco was selected to Team Dion OR Team Rice. One could only wonder if this was the Pro Football Hall of Fame deliberation process and not the 2014 Pro Bowl draft. Nobody likes to be picked last, but what's even worse is to note be selected at all. Despite not being selected to either team, we'll look at how the Broncos All-Stars did in Sunday's matchup in Hawaii.

This was, without a doubt, Peyton's worst game of his career. Despite completing 100% of his attempted passes, he went 0 for 0 for 0-yards. Not having a reputation for athleticism, Manning did nothing to improve that stigma by rushing for 0 yards on 0 attempts. One could only wonder how clean Manning's jersey was at day's end, mostly because the Pro Bowl equipment manager wasn't able to find it following the conclusion of the game.

Demaryius Thomas, heralded league wide for having exceptional hands and elusive speeed, was nowhere to be seen. In fact, nobody saw him on the field. Failing to capitalize on that elusiveness, Thomas notched 0 catches for 0 yards. Hate to tell you DT, but you're going to have to do a little more if you want to get that Pro Bowl MVP nod. Maybe next year.

Even Kicker Matt Prater, the Bronco who owns the record for longest fieldgoal kick in NFL history struggled to connect... at the airport. Prater missed all flights departing Denver for Hawaii this week. Sure, missing one flight is excusable, but all flights over the course of the week? Clearly, Prater has bigger things on his mind. Let's hope it's football related.

Matt Prater wasn't the only one to miss his flight. When we dispatched MHR correspondant Ian Henson to Julius Thomas' home in the suburbs of Denver, Thomas, in his bathrobe and slippers, was found packing a suitcase full of heavy coats and sweaters, clothes not typically worn in Hawaii. Henson would have pressed for details, but was frightened away from his vantage point in the bushes outside Thomas' bedroom window when Julius' robe opened without warning.

When we (repeatedly) reached out to Louis Vasquez over the phone earlier this week to get his thoughts on not being drafted to a Pro Bowl squad, Vasquez had this to say. "Stop calling me. You [expletive] know exactly why we aren't in the Pro Bowl. We worked our [Pete Carrol's mother related expletive] [12th man expletive] [fish market related expletive] in and now we're going to the big game next week in New York." Okay, Louis. Have it your way, but I hate to tell you, you missed it. The Pro Bowl was played today in Hawaii, not next week in New York.... That's where the Super Bowl is....

Oh wait...