"We just played terrible," Anderson said. "We've got to get better, watch tape, get better next week."
To every question asked.
No matter the question, Anderson's response remained the same, even when he was asked about the personal foul facemask penalty called against Demaryius Thomas. It's the same method Marshawn Lynch used Sunday after his team's victory over the Arizona Cardinals, saying, "Thanks for asking," to every question posed.
Lynch's canned responses infuriated some reporters Monday (mainly the national crowd - the local beat writers were cool), but I wholeheartedly agree with Deadspin's take. If you don't want dumb answers, don't ask dumb questions.
These aren't questions. These are prompts, from reporters who don't actually have specific knowledge holes they want filled; they have holes in their game stories, and they have deadlines. The gamer formula requires a quote from a player immediately after mentioning something he did, even if that quote isn't enlightening or educational or entertaining in any way.
Why? Because it's one of the only concrete things that differentiates a story written by someone who spent their Sunday in a press box from one written by someone who watched from the comfort of their own couch. It's no wonder the beat people get defensive when denied even that paltry prize.
Here's the thing - Anderson's troll responses are kind of brilliant. He actually is saying something of value, and the only question that was asked where his canned response didn't make sense was a question about the officiating. He has more of an obligation to avoid that question than answer it.
I'm totally fine with Anderson avoiding the postgame routine.
Furthermore, unlike "Thanks for asking," Anderson's replicated response is how coaches respond to random questions all the time. Just look at John Fox's response to a question about potentially being the No. 2 seed after next week (emphasis mine).
"I told the guys a long time ago that it really doesn't matter where you start, but where you finish," Fox said. "We had a set-back tonight that we'll learn from. We'll go home and get ready for the Raiders next week."
We just played terrible. We've got to get better, look at the tape, and get ready for next week.
Not that Broncos Country thought it was merited, given the poll results below, but Anderson apologized for his curt responses.