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Fantasy Football: Fix your draft mistakes now

While you were high-fiving and talking to people that could not care less about your fantasy team, we've been working on fixing the damage that you've done. FanDuel has a special offer for SB Nation fans — The FanDuel 5-Pack. It’s 5 free contest entries for new players only, no experienced players allowed. Play now!

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Last minute line-up questions? Trade opinion? Need a deep sleeper? Tweet me whenever, especially before game time @TheOrangePage.

I think most of the time fantasy football experts brag about what they led you to last season, how they felt about the offseason or submit some type of subtle song lyric that seven people will get. Here's a story... Last season in this very column, I get an email early, early Thanksgiving morning, "Ian," the letter says.

"Thank you for all of your DFS advice, I say that from the bottom of my heart. I could afford Thanksgiving dinner for my family finally."

Talk about a hell of a responsibility...

Well, from one degenerate to another, it ain't no thang.

I have no idea what I am doing...

League Play Waiver Wire:

*Sunday and Monday player recommendations only

Week 1; You're way too optimistic about your lineup, too much Matthew Berry, too much Michael Fabiano. Pop quiz hot shot... Where is everyone else that you're playing against receiving their information? If you contemplated playing Matthew Stafford this week, then you're part of the problem, not the solution.

See, fantasy football is easy, league play is still where the craftsmanship is, DFS is for bots and losers, put me head-to-head against anyone, I've got them. Ten team league? Don't make me laugh, your friends will hate you by week 3 if you use my recommendations. The IRS audited me last year, what did your fantasy football team do?

Ok, what you may not know if this is your first time reading this column, I don't recommend anyone that might be on a roster, I look for guys that are on less than 50% of rosters on Yahoo and ESPN in this part. I also feature a 'This is insane' pick, that's someone that I think you can homerun swing on:

My Week 1 QB recommendations: Derek Carr, Tyrod Taylor, Alex Smith, Matt Ryan, Matthew Stafford 'This is insane' Dak Prescott.

My Week 1 RB recommendations: DeAngelo Williams, Spencer Ware, Frank Gore, Arian Foster, Carlos Hyde, Rashad Jennings, Charles Sims, Ameer Abdullah, LeGarrette Blount 'This is insane' Chris Thompson

My Week 1 WR recommendations:
Willie Snead, Corey Coleman, Allen Hurns, Marvin Jones, DeVante Parker, Torrey Smith 'This is insane' Kenny Britt

My Week 1 TE recommendations: Zach Miller, Vance McDonald, Julius Thomas, Martellus Bennett 'This is insane' Jesse James

My Week 1 K recommendation: Dustin Hopkins

My Week 1 DST recommendations: Minnesota, Detroit.

Both my defense and my kicker are 'insanes' every week by the way.

Get called shiesty this Monday and Tuesday:

The object of a shiesty is to pick up the guy on Saturday or Sunday, play him or not, but just make sure that you have him on your roster. This way during the games on Sunday or the next day on Monday someone in your league will think they're being slick and boom! He's not there, he's on your roster and he's available for Antonio Brown or David Johnson.

Dak Prescott, just pick him up this morning, drop your backup quarterback. You don't have to start Mr. Prescott if you don't want to, but if you don't you might actually be angry soon.

Next week I will remind you of what an idiot you were for sitting Prescott for Matthew Stafford.

Daily Fantasy:

What fun is FanDuel if you don't get the satisfaction of grabbing someone on the cheap and watching him light up your scoreboard and wallet?

Go with these guys:

QB - Alex Smith, Ben Roethlisberger, Russell Wilson, Tyrod Taylor, Aaron Rodgers, Andrew Luck, Derek Carr.
RB - Devonta Freeman, Todd Gurley, Lamar Miller, Ezekiel Elliot, Mark Ingram, Adrian Peterson, David Johnson.
WR - Antonio Brown, Julio Jones, Odell Beckham, Mike Evans, Allen Robinson, Amari Cooper, T.Y. Hilton, Brandin Cooks, A.J. Green, Brandon Marshall, Doug Baldwin, Dez Bryant, Michael Floyd, Keenan Allen, Eric Decker.
TE - Travis Kelce, Gary Barnidge, Jordan Reed, Martellus Bennett, Vance McDonald, Julius Thomas, Antonio Gates.

Avoid these guys:

QB - Joe Flacco, Marcus Mariota, Andy Dalton, Ryan Fitzpatrick, Carson Wentz, Philip Rivers.
RB - Matt Jones, Derrick Henry, Theo Riddick, Melvin Gordon, Ameer Abdullah, Thomas Rawls, T.J. Yeldon, Danny Woodhead.
WR -  Chris Hogan, Mike Wallace, Sammie Coates, Tyler Boyd, Kenny Still, Kamar Aiken, Dorial Green-Beckham, Travis Benjamin, Mohamed Sanu, Markus Wheaton, Terrance Williams.
TE -  Richard Rodgers, Austin Seferian-Jenkins, Jacob Tamme, Kyle Rudolph, Jordan Cameron, Crockett Gillmore, Jared Cooke, Eric Ebron.

Side note: Rough week for bread and butter receivers Julio Jones and DeAndre Hopkins, I'd avoid them in DFS.

Broncos players:

I said it on MHR Live, but I wouldn't have started any Broncos other than C.J. Anderson, Denver's defense and Brandon McManus... So, if you want to judge me, judge me.

My craziest Daily Fantasy Sports lineup this week:

Dak Prescott, Todd Gurley, David Johnson, Antonio Brown, Odell Beckham Jr., Brian Quick, Zach Miller, Dustin Hopkins, Detroit Lions.