I’ll be honest, it was very freeing for me to write this article in 2011 outlining some of the minor fashion faux pas that some fans exhibit when wearing their Broncos jerseys. The original article was written with tongue firmly wedged in cheek (I mean how could there be a wrong way to wear a Broncos jersey?). However, with the 2017 season bearing down on us, it may be a good time for a review.
1. Do your best to honor the uniform choice of the team on each particular game day. For example, [on] Orange Monday - You should probably choose your orange jersey over the white or blue. When the Broncos are in their whites, go for the whites. Home blues? Go with that. Keep it simple. However, when in doubt as to what uniform the Broncos are going to wear, you can always err on the side of orange. Nobody will fault you for it and you're guaranteed to look pretty freakin' sweet in it.
In the event of a “Color Rush” uniform, stick with the “go orange” rule-of-thumb.
2. Players retire and move on leaving you with a relic of their tenure in Denver. What do you do with old jerseys? It really depends on the player. If you have the jersey of a former Bronco great:Sharpe, Elway, McCaffrey, Smith, Atwater, Gradishar, Little, etc., go on with your bad self and proudly strut. Jerseys of players that recently left the team are forbidden. There is nothing sadder than seeing someone walking around in a Broncos Hillis jersey. I'm not saying that you have to throw it away. I'm saying you have to put it in a drawer for a few years. There's always a chance that player could come back (Shannon Sharpe did!) or the wearing of the jersey could be ironically awesome (Jerry Rice #19). However, if a player leaves under terrible circumstances that embarrasses the city of Denver or the Broncos, under no circumstances are you to wear that jersey ever again. Seriously, you don't want to remind your fellow Broncos fans of the drama around Jay Cutler or Eddie Kennison. (It should be noted that Travis Henry and Maurice Clarett jerseys are kind of on the embarrassing/awesomely ironic fence. I'll defer to the individual fan to make the call on those.)
Jay Cutler or Eddie Kinnison jerseys will never be cool.
3. Under no circumstances are you to deface a Broncos jersey. Putting duct tape on it in the shape of the male anatomy because you were angry about how Cutler left Denver is insulting to the colors. Also forbidden is the cutting of jerseys in half to sew together with another team's jersey. It's not so hard to make a singular choice on game day. Just pick one. You don't need to destroy two jerseys to show that you're noncommittal to either team. Jerseys that have been altered to fit the female form are allowed if done in good taste.
Husky fellas should be proud to wear their tastefully altered jerseys as well.
4. Jerseys with your own name or "#1PRATERFAN" on it are frowned upon (unless you're under eight years-old). Gimmicky broncos jerseys are also not encouraged.
I once saw a guy at a game wearing a jersey with the name BongWater on the back. He is the exception to this rule. I can’t explain why.
5. Do not cross contaminate your jersey. Please do not wear your Broncos jersey with a hat from another sport/team. It's confusing to see someone in a vintage Elway jersey also rocking a Tampa Bay Rays hat. The jersey demands respect while the silly hat choice makes one wonder...
There are few things on this Earth worse than this.
6. Do not tuck your jersey into your shorts. We all know this guy. He's the one who also rocks the cell phone holster on his belt and wears black socks with sandals. He must be stopped at all costs.
Peyton, what are you doing tucking your jersey into you jeans?! Okay, it’s not shorts, but come on, dude! The Super Bowl win made us look the other way, but woah... You’re going to let Montana show you up like this? It’s something we can’t unsee.
7. Do not buy one of those elongated "basketball length" jerseys if it's not exactly what you want. There's something awful about a dude that wears a jersey that hangs on him like a nightgown.
8. Dry clean your jerseys. Home washing machines will absolutely destroy your jersey. They cost more than some some dressy clothes and need to be afforded that same respect. Also, they can get more than a little gross after a season's worth of wing sauce and beer stains (also recently the tear stains have been a bit overwhelming).
Can’t emphasize this enough.
9. Personally, I don't wear jerseys on non-game days and never during the off season. I see them as a game day treat. There's just something wrong about seeing that rogue Steeler fan at the DMV in May rocking the full regalia.
Football jerseys are for football season.
10. Most importantly, especially for fans outside of Colorado, acknowledge your fellow Broncos fans who rock jerseys on game day. Be prideful that you root for the best team in football and revel in that with your fellow fans. We are the greatest fans in football and, after following these rules, Bronco fans should look better than the rest. Look good, feel good. Feel good, <something something> Broncos win the Super Bowl.
Who cares. Just wear orange every day.
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