2018 NFL Picks: Week 3

Apparently Week 1 didn’t shed any extra light on picking Week 2 games as I went an identical 8-7-1. I mean, IDENTICAL record picking games, including ties. Is this groundhog day? Anyone playing the “can I beat Pete” game, just use this template and assume I go 8-7-1 in Week 3 as I’m beginning to see a trend here.

Now to pat myself on the back, well, if I could reach my back that mean, I did catch some heat for “forgetting” to pick the Cardinals. To my defense, I did say that I did pick the Cardinals, I picked them to score zero points. BOOM, right on the money! I was a whopping 1 point off too. I predicted 33-0 and it ended up being 34-0. Soooooo close to perfection!

Onto the picks

Last Week: 8-7-1
Overall: 16-14-2

New York Jets (1-1) at Cleveland Browns (0-1-1) 6:20pm NFLN TNF
Another riveting game in the long and storied history of Thursday Night Football. I have to assume that the NFL figured this game would have two rookie QBs battling it out when they made the schedule. And who knows, there’s still how many minutes until gametime? C’mon Cleveland, do the least Cleveland thing you’ve ever done by giving the fans what they want and starting Baker Mayfield. Rumor has it you won’t win this game anyways, so you might as well not win this game with your future at QB. Prediction: Jets 16, Browns 13

New Orleans Saints (1-1) at Atlanta Falcons (1-1) 11:00am FOX
This game has “Falcons” written all over it. So why am I hesitant to pick them? Actually, I’m not, not at all. This will be a bloodbath. The only wildcard is Drew Brees keeping the Saints in it by getting hot, but man, he seems to have hit that QB wall this year. This game is an easy win for the Falcons, even with them forgetting about Julio in the endzone. Prediction: Saints 24, Falcons 31

Green Bay Packers (1-0-1) at Washington Redskins (1-1) 11:00am FOX
What in the hell Green Bay? You, Cleveland, Minnesota, and Pittsburgh are on my list for making me type a -1 at the end of the W/L record. These extra keystrokes are REALLY annoying. I hope your QB hurts his... kidding kidding kidding. R-E-L-A-X everyone, it’s called a joke! Prediction: Packers 30, Redskins 20

Indianapolis Colts (1-1) at Philadelphia Eagles (1-1) 11:00am FOX
Andrew Luck vs Carson Wentz seemed to be a great storyline until they both got hurt. I get it Philly, he was “on schedule” (wink wink, nod not) to come back right around now. But you can lie to your fans, lie to yourself, lie to the NFL and lie to anyone you want, but you won’t fool me into thinking if you didn’t look like the excrement that comes out of your fan’s backsides after 10 too many beers and 5 too many Cheesesteaks that Wentz would be starting on Sunday. Sorry, not buying it. #PlayerSafety indeed! Prediction: Colts 23, Eagles 24

Buffalo Bills (0-2) at Minnesota Vikings (1-0-1) 11:00am CBS
Bottom feeder against contender. Enough said, right? Prediction: Bills 6, Vikings 31

Oakland Raiders (0-2) at Miami Dolphins (2-0) 11:00 CBS
How do you predict an undefeated team goes down at home to a completely defeated team? Have I completely lost all my marbles because I honestly think the Dolphins will lose? Prediction: Raiders 27, Dolphins 24

Denver Broncos (2-0) at Baltimore Ravens (1-1) 11:00am CBS
Everything is going against the Broncos for this game.

• First: It’s against the Ravens who have had our number since they moved to Baltimore.
• Second: This is an 11:00am game
• Third: The Ravens just lost and will be pissed and looking for revenge

So what’s my prediction? Take it away Clubber!

Prediction: Broncos 17, Ravens 27

Cincinnati Bengals (2-0) at Carolina Panthers (1-1) 11:00am CBS
Are the Bengals really this good? Will Cam Newton find his swag? Will Christian McCaffrey be utilized finally? So many questions, so few answers until this game is played. Prediction: Bengals 20, Panthers 24

New York Giants (0-2) at Houston Texans (0-2) 11:00am FOX
Something has to give in this game. Wait, this is the tie for the week, isn’t it? The Giants are awful and the Texans are at least competitive. I’m giving this to the home team. Prediction: Giants 13, Texans 20

Tennessee Titans (1-1) at Jacksonville Jaguars (2-0) 11:00am CBS
This one shouldn’t really be all that competitive. The Jags are a Top 3 team in the NFL, and the Titans are kinda, well, they’re the forgotten ones in their division. Prediction: Titans 9, Jaguars 31

San Francisco 49ers (1-1) at Kansas City Chiefs (2-0) 11:00am FOX
Can Mahomes continue his record shattering hot streak? I really have no idea, but it doesn’t look like he’s gonna have much resistance against the Niners. Prediction: 49ers 31, Chiefs 42

Los Angeles Chargers (1-1) at Los Angeles Rams (2-0) 2:05pm CBS
Which team is really the home team in this one? It’s kinda like when the Giants play the Jets, isn’t it? I suppose the Rams are the ones with the season tickets to this game, even though it really doesn’t matter. If the Chargers can keep it to 2 scores, they should go ahead and consider it a victory. Prediction: Chargers 15, Rams 34

Dallas Cowboys (1-1) at Seattle Seahawks (0-2) 2:25pm FOX
Something tells me that Pete Carroll is losing his team, which is fun to see happen. It’s almost as fun as watching the Patriots struggle. I love feasting on the salty tears of SeaChicken bandwagon fans. Prediction: Cowboys 24, Seahawks 20

Chicago Bears (1-1) at Arizona Cardinals (0-2) 2:25pm FOX
Finally we get to see the ‘85 Bears 2018 all-time-great-defense-because-the-media-circle-jerks-Khalil-Mack beatdown every 4 letter network is salivating to see. How the Cardinals trot out Bradford in this game is beyond me. Its as if they actually hate their fanbase. Prediction: Bears 24, Cardinals 3

New England Patriots (1-1) at Detroit Lions (0-2) 6:20pm NBC SNF
Get some Lions!!! Too bad you suck! Prediction: Patriots 32, Lions 13

Pittsburgh Steelers (0-1-1) at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (2-0) 6:15pm ESPN MNF
In this week’s soap opera, Antonio Brown is jet skiing as his teammates workout. This team is lost and clueless. I want the Browns rematch just to see them get their first victory in 2 years against the “Mighty Steelers.” Prediction: Steelers 17, Buccaneers 27